I DON'T LUV U: SICK GETS SICKER

QUESTION: What can be more sick than a sex MMS circulated around?

ANSWER: A film based on the scandal. Worse, it has a silly title, "I don't luv u".

"I Don't Luv U" adds idiocy to the sickness and serves it in the garb of loud, moral preaching.

Sample these scenes:

A college classroom is all about eyeing a girl's cleavage or her legs. Random, badly shot, close ups of both are seen to show what the boys have on their minds.

The hero, being the silliest prankster of all, scribbles something on a piece of paper and passes it to his friend to hand it to a girl in a skirt. The teacher notices this and orders the friend to read it aloud. The note says, "Get your legs waxed." Everyone laughs at this awesome joke. Sick. Check.

A girl walks up to a guy and says hello. He can't recall her name. Miffed, she turns to walk away. The guy sets his eyes on her jeans clad butt. The screen shows.. "new entry...adding new data.." And of course he recalls her name. Sick. Check.

One of the hero's friends, a Sardar, is in love with a girl. To woo her, he climbs up to her bedroom, dressed like Spiderman. The girl's Sardar father walks in, shouts 'freeze' and vanishes. He comes back, armed with an album. They all pore into his yesteryear pictures of him as a child, dressed like Spiderman. He reveals he gave up that dream because he got married! Idiotic. Check.

The boy (Ruslan Mumtaz-- insipid) is introduced to the girl ( Chetna Pande --not bad) by a class friend. The hero says, "Hi...do you believe in sex at first sight..I mean..love at first sight?" This happens to be his idea of an opening line every time he meets a girl. Sick. Check.

Despite the horror of an introduction, the girl smiles at him the next time she meets him. And then she tells him,"Chalo,time pass karte hain....but remember we are not a couple..because I don't luv U." Idiotic. Check.

The two do their "time pass" in a song  routine.

 One day, the girl calls up the boy and tells him she is alone at home. He promptly goes over. She is dressed in a sexy, black number. He pounces on her. She is shocked. She tells him she wants to show him what she has prepared for a dance show. So she dances. He watches. He pounces again. She is shocked again. Idiotic. Check.

Somehow, a sex MMS video of the two gets circulated. A news channel head tells a reporter," Welcome to the world of Prime Time." Really?

At one point , the girl tells the bewildered boy, "It's not about what you do. It's about how you do it."

Someone please tell that to the writer, director, Amit Kasaria, who has also written the controversial lyrics, "Ishq ki  maa ki..."