ISHAQZAADE : SOUND AND FURY

                                       Ishaqzaade is a love story that  can fill you with enough hate to call the hero a  #@*#zaade. There lies both  the USP and the challenge to make you fall in love with him and his love story.

Gunfire and Hindu Muslim ire block the path of true love. Our village Romeo is Parma (Arjun Kapoor), a local goon who points a gun at Zoya (Pareeniti Chopra) and picks up  Chand (Gauhar Khan),the sexy dancer to entertain his MLA grandfather. The fiery Zoya bites the bullet and brandishes her own gun to get even. So begins a love story with hate spouting forth through bullets, racing bikes and jeeps. The hate runs in their blood with the respective families engaged in political feud playing the Hindu Muslim card of sworn enemies.

Parma is from the Hindu family of Chauhans who takeS pride in carrying  out his grandfather’s policy of “mardon ki haweli mardon ki bhasha”. Zoya of the Quereshis,takes pride in wearing her father’s waistcoat, sells her gold earrings to buy a gun and displays more balls than all the town’s men. The two come together to make a deadly pair of sworn enemies who when struck with Cupid’s gun, are like lost puppies on the run from big bad wolves.

The movie is written and directed by Habib Faisal who made an impressive directorial debut with a good, simple story, ”Do Dooni Chaar”. Faisal has also written  “Band Bajaa Baraat” where the male character takes time to grow up, acknowledge and understand love, much like the character in Ishaqzaade. Like BBB, his female characters are full of fire, can take on the world and all the  ...zaades.

Ishaqzaade’s  strength lies in its ruthless, fast paced, contemporary treatment of the everblack story of  caste and religion based hatred in small towns. While the stronghold of political gang lords and family wars are well established, along with interesting nuances in the main characters, the story falls short in the emotional quotient of young and innocent love. The ishq in Ishaqzaade could have been a lot more powerful to match the hard and gritty tone of the film.

Taking off well with a good intermission twist, the film falls a notch in the second half into the clichéd territory of lovers taking refuge with a kothewali .Parma’s character which starts off as a “jaanwar” gets into a confused zone .The fast paced momentum of the plot deprives one of  any memorable romantic moments so crucial to a good love story that earns repeat watches like QSQT. The sound and fury of guns,takes over the heart.

Kausar Muneer’s lyrics, “main pareshaan… “, besides the title track “Ishaqzaade” and “Jhalla walla” written to Amit Trivedi’s fantastic music score, adds beautifully to the film’s gritty tone. The cinematography (Hemant Chaturvedi), well chosen locales and the edit (Aarti Baja) together blend in seamlessly with the narrative.

Arjun Kapoor makes a decent debut in a challenging role of playing a lover boy with grey shades. The movie belongs to Parineeti Chopra who is at ease being the fiery yet endearing girl with a gun. Gauhar Khan steals the show with both her role and two hot sizzling numbers superbly choreographed by Chinni Prakash. Her confidence and chutzpah is electrifying on screen.

 The relentless and ruthless theme of Ishaqzaade   packs in punch and passion with the well adapted age old Romeo and Juliet plot but lacks the sweet, memorable romance of Qayamat se Qayamat Tak. Watch it for the Ishaqzaadi urf Parineeti.

JANNAT 2: WO OH HO WOAH!

“Woh  oh ho wo” ,the hummable signature song and tune of Jannat 2 is not the only woah factor about the movie. Bhatt movies usually sell on shock value which come from Emraan’s kisses and skimpily dressed new faces. In Jannat 2,they try to shock you with expletives. But here’s the unintentional shocker. The story has an alternate hero, not in Emraan Hashmi as the promos would have us believe but in the deadly Randeep Hooda.

Opening promisingly to the soundtrack of ‘Woh..oh..wo..o..” and Sonu Dilli KCC -Kutti kamini cheez(Emraan Hashmi ), a smart ass, mouthing lines like “abhi to goli di hai,baad mein goli doonga”, the movie comes to the point quickly. With its first well choreographed (Raju Khan)song, within ten minutes, “ Tera deedar hua..” we see Hashmi  is not quite the dog as he is made out to be. He is a small time gun supplier who falls in ‘Bhattesque’(romantic songs) blind love with Jhanvi(Esha Gupta) and dreams of making a ‘Jannat’ like life with her. His dreams are foiled by a half dead cop, ACP Pratap Raghuvanshi  (Randeep Hooda, hotter than the heroine)  who claims “jeene aur jaagne ki koshish karta hoon” as a reason for living with the bottle. The cop, seeking personal revenge for his wife’s death, wants to turn  Sonu, the dog into a police rat who will squeal on an arms dealer(Manish Choudhary).

By now, we know that Jannat 2 is not a sequel of Jannat. Secondly it makes you miss the prequel. It is an individual story which could have worked as well in any backdrop and with any title. Though clichéd, this one stands out not just with its popular songs and Emraan Hashmi’s familiar and growing charm but with a carefully developed but predictable plot . A cop plants a rat in the midst of an arms racket  and an engrossing and expletive loaded  cat and mouse embroiler game follows.

The director, Kunal Deshmukh shows more skill here in focusing on the central drama that involves a victim getting trapped into a deadly racket. However the story and screenplay (Shagufta Rafique) while engaging enough till a fascinating intermission point , doesn’t get a decent grip on the romance much integral to the plot and the eventual end. Also, the story ends up being Hooda’s story more than Hashmi’s. Dialogues (Sanjay Masooma)  as suggested by Hashmi’s name, are full of four letter words but at the same time do a decent job of weaving in emotion. The best part of the screenplay lies in the characterization of both Hashmi and Hooda. Again the characters are clichéd but succeed in involving you with their personal dilemmas. It would have been more interesting to see Hashmi’s character being as ‘KCC’ as he is supposed to be. The bonding  and fireworks  between him and Hooda surpasses the chemistry between Hashmi and Esha Gupta and provides more reason for drawing you in.

Although Jannat 2 is well shot (Bobby Singh)  and well directed, the movie fails to make the desired impact for two reasons. The premise is the same one repeated in every Bhatt movie - that of a gangster seeking escape from crime to a normal life. Secondly, the love story needs to be as intense as the crime drama. Here the romance is only expressed through songs and Esha’s presence does nothing to make us believe as passionately in Emraan’s love except his own sincerity.

The soundtrack and the music(Pritam) which has always been a Bhatt card, continues to rule here. The magical combination of Hashmi, Bhatt and Pritam brings out all the entertainment of a Bollywood movie. The title song “who ho oh..” written by Sayeed Qadri charms as much as his  “tu hi mera deen hai..imaan hai..Rab ka shukraana..” brings out the required intensity. “Sang hoon tere” is lovely on the ears and “Tu hi mera..”   as a looped line refuses to leave you.

Emraan Hashmi, gets better and better with every movie and comes across as an adorable, sincere pup instead of the dog his name makes him out to be. However, both his character and performance is out shadowed by Randeep Hooda who plays the intense, hardened cop tormented by his wife’s memories, brilliantly. Esha Gupta passes off with stiff smiles and Manish Chaudhary makes you miss a fearful villain on screen.

Those expecting Hashmi’s sizzling scenes, will be disappointed and those expecting simple entertainment, will be happy to watch the movie.

Jannat 2  one may not be a ticket to paradise but is far from the road to hell.

TEZ: DEAD END

Want to watch speeding trains, cars and bikes for two hours without caring who, what, why? Here’s your chance to fulfill that fantasy of a video game without pushing a button.

The place is London. Aakash (Ajay Devgn) is caught by the police for being an illegal immigrant. Cut. His wife, Nikita (Kangana) screams and falls. Cut. Devgn is back in 4 years, with accomplices, Zayed Khan and Sameera Reddy.They plan to plant a bomb in a train. Cut. Apparently, the deported man in depression has watched “Speed” and Japanese film “The Bullet Train” and learnt something. He calls Boman Irani, railway officer and warns him that if the train’s speed is below 60 km/hr, the train will explode. Enters the good Indian cop, Arjun Khanna (Anil Kapoor).He barks orders at an imaginary troop of men on the phone and looks suitably concerned.Cut.

Directed by Priyadarshan, with this abrupt style of rapid shots and cuts, the story ends and the chase begins. Now we know why the film is titled “Tez”. Except that time goes by even slower than you can imagine.

The train starts speeding at 110 km per hour. Another cop, Mohanlal is inside the train shouting orders at all and sundry. At the railway headquarters, Boman shouts orders and points at railway maps. Anil Kapoor shouts some more, gets into a police car and quickly locates Devgn who gets him to dump a suitcase of cash into the water. Devgn disappears.

A boat chase begins with Sameera Reddy bravely fighting the waves and gun shots from a helicopter. The chase continues with her speeding on a bike, followed by a fleet of police cars. The sequence is as follows: speeding cars, speeding bike, close-up of Anil Kapoor’s face, speeding cars, speeding bike, long shot of girl in helmet, speeding cars, speeding bike. Did we mention the film is so cleverly titled ‘Tez”? And that the hero is Devgn, not the bike superwoman?

Next chase. No car. Zayed Khan runs. Anil Kapoor in overcoat, also runs. He runs with admirable style. Zayed Khan runs faster. He even runs up a wall, like Superman. Despite a bullet in his leg, he jumps into the water with Devgn waiting for him. That’s quite “tez”, you notice. Devgn also runs. Not when he is chased but when his dear friend needs him most. Now you are not quite sure if he is the hero after all. He is not even seen in most of the film except when he makes phone calls on his cell and then throws it into the water.

So that’s the major part of action screenplay(Robin Bhatt) covered, which is an accomplishment as there is no plot and one line trying to sound like a dialogue (Aditya Dhar):“ek who  jiske paas haarne ke liye kuch bhi nahin aur ek main jo sab haar chukaa hai.”  Here is an action packed non story which has nothing to say and nowhere to go. The lack of a strong and believable motivation for Devgn to take on the entire city of London, makes the whole experience meaningless and silly.

The remainder is a blur between the speeding train, few rapid flashbacks cut to the present with Ajay Devgn chased by Anil Kapoor at a railway station. A dialogue exchange and a gunshot settles the issue so quickly that you start wishing for the mindless chase instead.

As to the speeding train, by now, one has lost track. One simply watches Mohanlal swinging between two trains and wonders why this great actor is reduced to this position.

The music (Sajid-Wajid) does not provide much relief or entertainment value, with the exception of “Tere Bina”. The simple  lyrics (Jalees Sherwani & Shabbir Ahmed) work well with Rahet Fateh Ali’s rendition.

The cinematography does most of the storytelling in the movie at it captures action sequences with great style. The only redeeming factor is  the action by Gareth Milne and  Peter Pedrero. However, the hero of the film, namely, the speeding train is eventually reduced to a guest appearance, as it  is shown mostly through brief ariel shots.

The actors do a good job of running, chasing, shouting into telephones and throwing cell phones into water. Each look as lost as the other when trying to say something important or emotional. What stands out are Kangana’s curls, Devgn’s  cell phones and Anil Kapoor’s  sneers and Mohanlal’s moustache. Mallika Sherawat’s appearance in an item song is for once, welcome.

If you enjoy speeding to reach dead ends, 'Tez’ is for you.

VICKY DONOR: Good News, Balle Balle

      With a title like ‘Vicky Donor’,you expect crass comic misfire in the movie. But here’s the good news. The sperm (plentiful) here not only meets the egg and  creates adorable children but  also a most delightful little story though slightly overstretched.

The premise is unusual. Vicky Chopra (Ayushmaan Khurrana), an aimless, unemployed 25 year old,5.10 ft tall(a plus for a donor), youth from Lajpat Nagar refugee colony in Delhi. is in demand for his highly bankable sperm. The connoisseur of this fertile, productive young man is Dr Chadda (Annu Kapoor) ,owner of a fertility clinic and a sperm bank. His reasons for settling in on this prize catch are simple. The cause of infertility on the rise is “strass”(stress) which Vicky does not have. He is a simple, “ happy, stress free,upjaao” full of life young man who doesn’t even stress over a stolen TV from his house or over his dog who he sells to get money or over a lack of a decent job. He has the looks and the brains of King Alexander’s lineage.. “Aryaputra” according to Chadda who tries to explain History and Biology parameters for a healthy sperm to a freaked out Vicky. Who better than him to give someone else a life?

But Vicky is happy to wander around shopping with his mother’s hard earned money from her beauty parlour where he is at home threading eyebrows and massaging tired legs. The determined doctor’s chase leads to this happy man’s stress when he meets a cute Bengali girl, Ashima Roy (Yami Gautam). He calls her fish, she calls him butterchicken.Now, how would the twain meet without creating strange flavours and ‘straass’ for both themselves and Chadda?

Written by Juhi Chaturvedi, the story of a sperm donor may not be an ideal one for an overpopulated country like India, but is an ideal example of a simple idea treated well with gentle humour ,warmth and understanding. Delicately handling it like a baby, the director, Shoojit Sircar, critically acclaimed for his first film, “Yahaan”; gives the simple script just the right feel good treatment. Filled with earnest moments from real family conversations amongst Bengali and Punjabi families, there are hilarious versions of Bhangra meeting Tagore scenes ending up in something less melodius, more balle balle.

The dialogues (Juhi) win your heart over even though they are laced slightly with much done to death Punjabi lingo. There is an honest appeal in Vicky’s character. His transition is aptly described by Dr Chadda from “heartless sperm” to “complicated sperm” to “greedy sperm”. His interactions with his mother, Dolly (Dolly Ahluwalia) and “modern as Metro” grandmother, Beeji (Kamlesh Gill) and their drunken bouts, tugs at the heartstrings more than a Karan Johar movie. The comic touch and the laughs generated by almost every scene comes as a pleasant surprise.

If one can overlook a few over the top, some mushy and some stretched moments in the latter half, the movie is full of several scene stealers. The script itself with a well crafted screenplay, great attention to fine detailing and funny, heartwarming dialogues steals the show. Next in line is Annu Kapoor who masters the act of making a point about the sperm’s job  with his two fingers in a way that’s funny but not crass. Ayushmaan  with his cute dimples, a TV Anchor till now, is a delightful find and plays Vicky so convincingly that you can’t imagine him as anyone else. Dolly Ahluwallia  and Kamlesh Gill  both deserve applause for  both their wonderful casting and their supporting performances. Debutant Yami  plays the next door sweet Bengali girl with aplomb and can teach Rani Mukherjee how to shed copious tears without irritating. Finally the best performance comes from John Abraham: both in his cameo dance and his debut as a gutsy producer to back an unlikely subject.

Music(mostly Abhishek-Akshay) is foot tapping, pleasant but average and doesn’t interfere with the story. “Rum and whiskey” has the techno  bhangra touch and  “paani da rang”, sung and co composed by Ayushman with Rochak Kohli, touches you with simple lyrics like “ Tu bhi aa…sabko chod ke..meri aankhiyaan jo anju rul de”(Kusum Verma). “Rokda” is the best song in the movie, written beautifully…”Yeh bhi laado woh bhi laado..paison ki yeh holi hai..jo bhi laado kum padega..aasmaan se badi jholi hai”.

The only noticeable flaws lie in the camera work and the edit which give the film an incomplete feel.

Overall, skillfully written, directed and performed, here’s a movie that will make the weekend as fun as fish, butter chicken, rum and whiskey .

 No stress.

Bittoo Boss:Punju Video Tadka

With a liberal smattering of Punju shaadi vaadi,video shideo lingo as rich and indigestible as greasy parrrr-on-tha, Bittoo Boss smacks of a story with Punjab da puttar honest, likeable heart which lacks finesse in its storytelling.

Bittoo(Pulkit Samrat), a rugged, bearded son of truck driver from a  Punjab village,shoots “seski”wedding videos and dreams of making it big.Predictably,he falls for a girl at a wedding  and somehow(unconvincingly) finds himself  getting trapped  into a blue film making racket.

Co written with Gautam Mehra ,debut director, Suapavitra Babul’s good hearted story starts off at a painfully slow pace at a wedding that is at a standstill literally, with baraatis waiting for the famous videographer,Bitto Boss who makes a dream entry on a bright yellow scooter.

Bittoo is instantly likeable with his affable behavior and enthusiastic camera work. One wouldn’t mind the camera on him more than the documentary like real faces and dialogue that make the world very real. Enters a totally authentic Punjabi kudi(Amita Pathak) who makes you wonder why Bittu would follow her around with his lenses. But then, love is blind and so are you out of curiosity for Bittu’s future.

Yes, you care for Bittu. That’s the good part. Like he says in the movie, “emotion pakadna hai”,his character has got it. Here’s the bad part. The screenplay lacks pace and structure. It meanders with Bitto’s love story with the wedding belle and only gets interesting post interval,when it’s no longer about the girl but him losing himself in the big, bad,blue world.

The characters that come into play, get even more real, more documentary like, except for Mohan Kapur who plays father to a girl bent on losing her virginity. The story finally gathers both focus, pace and a decent style, only to get filmy and clichéd in the end.

The script, reminiscent of “Band, Baaja,Baraat”,“Love, sex aur Dhokha” and “Ragini MMS” in its style and authencity,had the potential of being almost as good.Dialogues are both the strength and the weakness of the movie. There are some good and witty  lines like “desh ki abaadi ki jad Simla mein hai” and philosophical lines on Honeymoon bedroom acts being “jismana action nahin, balki do dilon ka aur ruhon ka connection hai”. However the lines  take the Punjabi lingo so seriously that it irritates, just the way a nonstop family chatter would initially entertain, then rankle a bystander in a train compartment. There is a sudden change in tone from light banter to intense arguments between the hero and the heroine, that fails to get the desired impact.

Music(Raghav Sachar) is fun with controversial lyrics(Kumar) like “Bittoo sabki lega” and “kick lag gayi…ankha teri sheeshe si”,likely to be  popular at weddings, though not as catchy as “Ainwy ainwy” from Band Baaja Baraat.The song “Man jaaga” is poignantly written by Aseem Ahmed Abbasid.. Dhoke se nazar ke, Jhonke se umar ke, Ret ke mahal sa, Deh gaya hai bikhar ke...'').The title track,”Kabootar” is pretty apt with lyrics like “ tu kabootar main kabootar, duniya kabootar khaana..Apna apna daana chugke, sabne hai udh jaana..”. The camera work (Maneesh Bhatt) and edit (Abhishek Seth) are decent and in keeping with the story.

Amongst the actors, Pulkit Samrat rules as the endearing, good simpleton. The rest are passable except for good supporting performance from sidekick (Ashok Pathak) who loves grinning and repeating “shakal se dikhta nahin”.Mohan Kapur makes a welcome comeback to acting.Amita Pathak does little to add to both presence and performance.

All in all, Bittoo Boss is a good and bad but not ugly debut by director, Supavitra Babul. Overdose of Punjabi tadka, as unpolished as a shaadi video but all said and done, with decent emotional tug. Likeable.

Housefull 2: A Zoo and a Circus

                        (Also published in http://fwa.co.in/SitePages/Housefull.aspx)

The makers of Houseful 2, Sajid (Khan) & Sajid (Nadiadwala), clearly believe they can laugh their way to the bank as the audience is a fool. Funny. One wouldn’t be surprised if they are proved right. Not funny.


In Houseful 2, they merrily create a big, expensive zoo starting with a crocodile and a python, which quickly turns into a circus with several jokers who fail to crack you up. Dabboo and Chintoo (yes, Randhir Kapoor and Rishi Kapoor allow themselves to be called by their pet names) Kapoor are brothers in arms over Dabboo’s illegitimacy. Chintoo calls himself the ‘real ‘ Kapoor. The brothers swear that they will find the richest son-in- law for their daughters to spite the other.

Hatred runs in the family. Dabboo’s daughter, Bobby, (Jacqueline Fernandez) with a python, and Chintoo’s daughter ,Heena (Asin) with a crocodile make venomous eyes at each other and eventually at muscleman, John Abraham and heroic Akshay Kumar who prance around with the respective crotch biting python and bum biting crocodile and eventually land into a boat unconscious with the girls. They wake up on an island, have a hand to hand combat over a coconut and as quickly hug and make up.

The two hulky bulkies are hired by teeny weeny Riteish Deshmukh, son of rich JD (Mithun Chakraborty) to impersonate him since he cannot walk straight (literally) to his tycoon but simple, Maharashtrian father who is perpetually tending to a harmless, white horse.

So now, there is one ‘real’ JD’s son, and two fake ones created for the Kapoors’ benefit and 50,000 pounds. JD happens to have a shady background and Akshay is the only “kamina”, (son of a rapist, Ranjit) who can help solve the comedy of errors. A fourth comedian, Shreyas Talpade is brought in whenever the jokes fall flat, which happens most of the time. The circus ends up at JD’s palatial London bungalow, continuing to hoodwink the Kapoor brothers along with JD. When all else fails, item specialist, Malaika Arora is brought in to gyrate to ”Anaarkali disco chali” and add more confusion.

The concept itself that involves several lies to cover one lie, is usually not a bad one by itself and provides several situational areas to entertain. The genre of a slapstick comedy provides a large platform for taking liberties and have general fun and has plenty of scope here to be used. But in Houseful 2, the story (not bad, Nadiadwala) sticks to predictable situations, convoluted plot, too many caricature characters that have been done to death before. An unimaginative screenplay cluttered with too many subplots and back stories (Sajid Khan,Tushar Hiranandani) and silly, non funny dialogues (Sajid,Farhad) like “mere baap ki hat-ti hai toh meri phat-ti hai” and “langoors, have my angoors’ fail to add the mildest entertainment.

As far as performances go, Akshay and John try hard to look crazy and stupid. The ever jovial Rishi Kapoor and Randhir Kapoor, who unfortunately could have been a big draw and might have shown potential to make a great pair for future films together, don’t succeed in lifting their characters much. It’s sad to watch the famous actors of yore dancing to Sajid&Sajid’s circus tunes. Mithun is neither convincing as JD, the tycoon nor Jagga the daaku. It’s sickening to see him chasing a dwarf woman around a tree in one sequence and falling all over Malaika in the next. Boman Irani ‘s usual squeal takes on various pitches that fall flat.

Shreyas and Riteish are the most natural of the lot and totally admirable for their effortless antics. The poor rich cousins - Jacqueline Fernandez and Asin don’t go beyond colurful contact lenses. Zarine Khan and Shazahn Padamsee simply need to look themselves to act sweet and dumb. Johnny Lever irritates more, performs less with his usual set of expressions. Chunky Pandey makes you laugh as little as his moustache can twitch. Ranjit as the famous rapist, is by far the most convincing, so established he is by his incredible and impressive past movies CV and consistent leer maintained in his brief appearance as his own spoof in Houseful 2.

The songs are better than the movie, with light music by Sajid-Wajid and decent, situational lyrics that do justice (Sameer Anjaan) like “Papa to band bajaaye” and “Anaarkali disco chali”.The cinematography and edit are pretty much functional. Costumes like hot pink and bright yellow shirts make their presence felt more than those sporting them.

A loud, fun and over the top masala entertainer is always welcome until it becomes a mammoth waste of megabucks on retard fare. This slapstick comedy slaps more, sticks less. A visit to a real zoo and a circus might provide more value for the money than the story of the ‘real’ Kapoor and the “real’ son of ….JD.